Can you believe it?

It is 2010! Amazing, no? I feel rather like a prig though because I must tell you that this monumental year is the end, not the beginning. I think you should know this small fact despite all the evidence that abounds to the contrary. Maybe, like me, you have been reading the lists of the best books/movies/celebrities/deaths/shoes of the decade and pondered on the selection process. Only after an appropriate amount of vapid speculation and wasted moments in that whirl of thought does the small voice of reason whisper, “the new decade starts NEXT year.”

After a small search, I realize that I’m not the only one giving voice to the logical fallacy all around. Jeff Jacoby (Boston Globe) points out that the new decade begins in 2011.

I remember having this same problem in 2000.

EVERYONE: “Woohoo! 21st century, awesome.”

ME: “Actually, the new century doesn’t start until January 1, 2001.”

EVERYONE: “Whoa, like a whole century. Monumental. I wonder what it will hold…”

ME: “But, really it hasn’t -“

Everyone grappled with the champagne bottle and fell into a moment of repose as the fireworks boomed overhead. The bar was relatively quiet, sparse. Plenty of room to move around.

EVERYONE: “Toast to the new century!” Glasses clinked. I lit a cigarette. If I had known then I would have said something really witty about how the new century made smoking sort of a criminal thing, how you can’t even smoke in bars anymore. I don’t care now, because I don’t smoke anymore and I’m glad to be rid of the stink when I go out to have a beer. But then, boy that is like…. crazy. Crazy new century kind of shit.

ME: “To the last of the century!”

EVERYONE: “That girl is a complete fruit. And, hey man – the world didn’t end. Y2K!”

More glasses clinked together.

That is the way it really happened.

Really.

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